The Outs Just Keep On Coming!

Seattle GM Jack Zduriencik has decided to have a go at comedy. Check out this hysterical routine:

Having inked to a contract one old shoe -- Jason Bay -- the Mariners have signed his lefty-swinging counterpart -- Raul Ibanez, to a one-year, $2.75 million deal.

Jay Leno, are you listening? This is killer material!

Hey, it's the Mariners' three million, and they can do anything they want with it, including invest it in becoming a punchline. If that's the plan, they can expect a high return on investment.

The 41-year-old out"fielder" squashed 19 home runs in 425 Yankee plate appearances last season, but that's it. A .308 OBP and defensive skills as robust as his hairline scream "end of career." It appears that Zduriencik plans to platoon Bay and Ibanez for a bilateral chump-athon, when instead he could give Michael Saunders, Franklin Guttierez, Mike Carp and Casper Wells a year's worth of at-bats to determine what they can accomplish.

The talk in the Pacific Northwest is that Ibanez adds missing power to the Mariner lineup. But the M's don't lack power so much as they lack hitting. An Ibanez-Bay platoon could help resolve that. Or it could make all of Seattle go blind.

Zduriencik's recent moves have made his team worse. Someone needs to stop him before the Mariners become the Astros.