The number of angels that can dance on the head of a pin.
Anything Hugo Chavez says.
How much money Sarah Palin raises for a presidential bid.
The health warning on a cigarette package.
The Oakland Raiders' first draft pick.
A baseball player's spring training stats.
What do these things have in common? They don't matter.
What a guy does in 50 non-consecutive at-bats (or 20 innings, pitched three-at-a-time) against competition that's either headed back to A-ball or working on its nascent slurve couldn't be less relevant if it were the Pope's pronouncements on birth control.
That's not to say that spring training doesn't matter, or even that how a guy looks during the is irrelevant. We'll be watching some guys' health closely. (I'm looking at you Brad Lidge.) We'll be looking to see whether some pitcher has developed a new pitch. But let's not get all excited that some lifetime .208 hitter has popped four home runs. I've gone yard in parks with 240-foot fences.
Opening Day is a week away. We'll start finding out then. Man I can't wait.
b
1 comment:
According to Jayson Stark, four of the past six teams that had the best spring record in MLB made the postseason. So maybe, just maybe, they should start printing spring records on the backs of bubble gum cards.
Signed,
Andy, an actual owner of the sweat shirt "Does Anal Retentive Have a Hyphen?"
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